I completely understand that what our rational brain wants in pregnancy, may be very different once we're in the thick of Birth Day. I don’t push an agenda or create an opinion on your decision. That means if you decide that you want to do everything possible to achieve your Plan A – I’ll be there supporting you 100%. And if you also decide to vary from Plan A, for whatever reason – I'll be there supporting you 100% as well. I won’t (and shouldn't) stop you from changing your mind and making the best decision for you and your family.
I fall a little bit in love with each of you
I watch each of my clients go through the massive journey to meet their little ones. It’s amazing seeing how each woman meets the challenges that are presented to her, whether it’s something that comes up in pregnancy or labour or with baby. I’m constantly in awe of the inner strength of women and I love seeing you find that strength! Sometimes it might be reaching the upper limits of coping in labour, then pushing through that “wall” and continuing on. Other women have to make difficult, unwanted decisions for herself and her baby. Sometimes it might be setting boundaries with family. Whatever it is, I am privileged to witness how amazing you are when you are most vulnerable and I fall a little bit in love.
I still wonder how you’re going, many years later
I am hired for a short period of time and know that families move past the Pregnancy Year into the wonderful years of parenting. I’m only one person on the journey and never expect to become lifelong friends. But each of my clients hold a special place in my heart and I think of you all, particularly on your baby’s birthday. I send you love from afar.
The HP/birth setting/family member/friend is a big pain the ass and not really helping you.
I have seen some pretty interesting dynamics over the years with women, their families and their health professionals. From this experience I could quite easily make judgement calls on what you should and shouldn't do. But I don’t! It’s not my place and not my journey. If you’re ready to push those boundaries in your life I will help you find resources to make that next step. On the flip side, what I (or anyone else) interprets as overbearing or patronising behaviour, you might find reassuring and feeling safe. Therefore, I will do everything I can to help Hold the Space to include everyone you choose to be part of your birth experience.
Being on call sucks.
I am yet to meet any birth worker who thinks that being on call is enjoyable. Most of us have coping strategies to help us deal with the long-term uncertainty of being on call. I have Plan A, B & C’s for my on call time and it certainly adds a certain level of stress to the family. So when you say you’re “Over it” in those last few weeks of pregnancy, I completely understand. The stress of uncertainty sucks! But you know what – I don't mind! I know how important it is for you and your baby to go into spontaneous labour. I’m willing to be part of this journey with you so that you have the best birth you can. The stress of being on call is totally worth it when I see you hold your baby for the first time.